You know what I’d like to do? I’d like to go back in time to whenever it was that whoever it was invented McDonalds or TV dinners or corn subsidies or whatever and make them stop. Because at Chick-fil-A today, I was trying to order my moderately-less-deadly Caesar wrap combo, and she asked me what I wanted to drink, and I had this momentary panic attack about whether it was worse to drink the sugar or the chemical fake sugar in my lemonade (forgetting that I could just, I don’t know, not order a combo and drink water instead).

But this just highlights something that I’m bitter about in general: I’m pissed off that previous generations have created all this fake food that is the only thing you can find anymore that it turns out is killing us all, and now it’s MY job to try to avoid it, but I can’t, really, unless I go off the grid and live off the land or something. And I have all this OTHER STUFF going on in my life right now and all this energy I spend on trying to figure out what lurking, genetically-modified, chemically-enhanced NON-FOOD food products to avoid is energy that could be much better-used elsewhere, except that if I do ignore it, I will get fat and cancerous and die. Even if I run marathons.

In conclusion: fuck you, ConAgra. Fuck you right in the eye.

PS: More updates coming soon.  I’ve been somewhat preoccupied, mostly with running around waving my arms and bleating uninformedly about the coming apocalypse.